It had been two years since I had talked to my ex-boyfriend. He now has a serious girlfriend, which apparently means I no longer exist. A few months ago his brother died, so I sent him a nice message sending my condolences and letting him know I was there if he needed me. He responded with a thank you and that was the extent of our conversation. I thought maybe after this tragic incident we could at least be civil and not pretend that neither of us existed in eachother’s world. Apparently I was wrong.
Not long after I had texted him, I noticed that he had deleted me as his friend on facebook (honest mistake I was sure ;) ) I thought if I sent him a friend request and he accepted this would mean that we could at least be friends. I think we both knew a real relationship would never happen between us, but we got along great as friends. A month or two passed by and my friend request was never accepted. Oh well.
During the traditional night before Thanksgiving outing, I went out with some friends and he happened to be at the same bar as me. He immediately turned his head when making eye contact with me. Wow. Really?! So a little later in the night, I realize his girlfriend has disappeared and he is signaling me to come say Hi. So being the somewhat inebriated girl that I am, I went up to him and said hi. He immediately said to me, “I’m sorry I didn’t add you on Facebook but my girlfriend won’t let me.” No Hi, how are you doing, what’s new? but an immediate apology for not being my Facebook friend. Obviously, he was bothered by this. I’m sure I made some smart ass remark about this and how ridiculous it all was, and how he needed to grow up and be a mature adult, to which he agreed with me about. I made sure to assure him that I had no intentions of ever having another relationship with him, and he completely agreed. He then went into the typical schpeel of “You’re a wonderful person, I want only the best for you, you deserve it…blah blah blah” we chit chatted for a while longer and said our goodbyes.
When I got home I realized how bothered I was by this, so I decided to send him a text (because inebriated texts are always a good idea) and said, “Hopefully nobody else is reading this, but I’m glad you are doing well and it was nice to see you.” No sexual innuendos or inappropriateness, just a nice little note to a friend.
Around 8 a.m. the next morning I got a response for him saying, “Who is this?” I began to panic. Obviously, she made him delete my phone number a long time ago, and I was about 99% sure that this was his girlfriend texting this, I don’t think he’d be up that early and he probably would have been able to guess who the text was from just by our conversation the night before. I didn’t want to get him in trouble for such a stupid thing. So I decide to just pretend I sent a message to the wrong number.
This is how the conversation ensued:
Me: Is this Shawn??
Him/Probably Her: Did I see u last night? The pub was packed. (at this point I was almost positive it wasn’t him because he would call the bar a pub??)
Him/Probably Her: This is Josh Smith (name has been changed =))
Me: Ummm…sorry I think I have the wrong number.
Him/Probably Her: Why u acting?
Him/Probably Her: Hey Melissa, there is someone else reading this and always will be. Josh is doing just fine, so no need for u to text him anymore. (I’m still trying to figure out how she figured out it was me…I think she probably just scrolled up on the phone and saw the message I had sent him when his brother died)
Him/Probably Her: Obviously he deleted our number for a reason! (Umm..obviously. You are crazy)
Him/Probably Her: Glad we have an understanding.
At this point I am just laughing hysterically and feeling really bad for someone who is in a relationship that they can’t trust so much that they have to constantly check their phone to make sure they are not talking to anyone else. That must really suck. I should probably keep my distance.
Also, the following Sunday I went to church and guess who was there and announcing she was becoming catholic?!? There goes God again with his silly sense of humor =) She must not have gotten to the part in her RCIA class where they teach about trusting and forgiveness….
Song of the Day: We Are Young feat. Janelle Monet by Fun
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
Seriously?!
So I am really trying hard to be open to others and not come off as stuck up or such a snob, since I am told sometimes I can be a little standoffish when first meeting someone. But after this fiasco, I feel like it’s better to wear my emotions on my sleeve and if I am not interested in someone, it is better to just give them the cold shoulder than be nice.
A few months ago I was at a friend’s house for a football game. At this party was Dan (name has been changed =) ). Some background history on Dan: When I was in high school my brother’s girlfriend was in the same class as me, my brother was 2 years older. When I was a junior, my brother was attending the local community college. While at school I would constantly hear stories of how my brother’s girlfriend was cheating on him with Dan. I would tell my brother and he would just yell at me and make me cry and call me a liar. Obviously, he wanted to trust and believe his girlfriend. Not long after this, my brother’s girlfriend broke up with him and became pregnant with Dan’s child. Told you so.
Fast forward about 8 years later….Dan is at this party. I really haven’t had a conversation with the guy and he begins to talk to me, I decide to not be rude and have a conversation with him, that wasn’t too painful. A few weeks later I see Dan at the movie theatre with his daughter, I say hello and proceed to go watch my movie. The next day I have a facebook message from him asking how my movie was, again I don’t want to be rude so I respond. We go back and forth for awhile with small talk, and eventually he asks me for my number. I know we have mutual friends and Moses Lake is such a small town that I am bound to run into him again, so I give him my number.
Dan proceeds to text me constantly that night, I tell him I am going to bed and he tells me that I should continue to text him until I fall asleep. Umm…no thanks. I’m tired. The next few days he continues to constantly text me and I’m not really sure what to do. I try to take a long time to respond and blame it on my nephews that were visiting at the time and he asks me, “do you want kids of your own?” Umm..ya, but not at the moment. He then says, “Oh you want to wait until you’re married?” At this point I am extremely irritated but don’t want to be rude, since I know he has a kid out of wedlock, so I nicely respond, ya..that’s the plan! To which he responds, “doesn’t everyone?? That was a joke”. Not sure I see the funniness in that…..
So then I try to nicely tell him I’m not interested by telling him, I’m not sure what your intentions are but I’m not interested in dating anyone right now. He responds that’s cool, I just wanted to go grab a drink sometime, did you just get out of a relationship or something? No…I didn’t, I just really don’t want to talk to you. And he still continued to text me regularly.
After consulting with some friends I decide the best way to handle this is the ignore method.
This is how it has been going:
12/25/11 – Merry Christmas!
12/26/11 – Hey how was your Christmas?
12/27/11 – Did you forget about me? =(
1/1/12 – How was your new years?
1/8/12 – Hey
1/17/12 – Happy Bday
1/21/12 – (FB Message) did you change your number or something? i have tried to text you a few times and you never respond =\
At this point I really just want to respond to him and tell him that I don’t think it’s a good idea to speak with him given the fact that he knocked up my brothers girlfriend, probably while my brother was dating her, and I really think it’s extremely inappropriate for him to even think it’d be ok to hang out with me.
Oh, and I later found out that at that same party he got my best friend’s 18-year-old sister in laws phone number…he is 28..gross.
Song of the day: Cry Me a River by, Justin Timberlake. Its pretty obvious why. :)
A few months ago I was at a friend’s house for a football game. At this party was Dan (name has been changed =) ). Some background history on Dan: When I was in high school my brother’s girlfriend was in the same class as me, my brother was 2 years older. When I was a junior, my brother was attending the local community college. While at school I would constantly hear stories of how my brother’s girlfriend was cheating on him with Dan. I would tell my brother and he would just yell at me and make me cry and call me a liar. Obviously, he wanted to trust and believe his girlfriend. Not long after this, my brother’s girlfriend broke up with him and became pregnant with Dan’s child. Told you so.
Fast forward about 8 years later….Dan is at this party. I really haven’t had a conversation with the guy and he begins to talk to me, I decide to not be rude and have a conversation with him, that wasn’t too painful. A few weeks later I see Dan at the movie theatre with his daughter, I say hello and proceed to go watch my movie. The next day I have a facebook message from him asking how my movie was, again I don’t want to be rude so I respond. We go back and forth for awhile with small talk, and eventually he asks me for my number. I know we have mutual friends and Moses Lake is such a small town that I am bound to run into him again, so I give him my number.
Dan proceeds to text me constantly that night, I tell him I am going to bed and he tells me that I should continue to text him until I fall asleep. Umm…no thanks. I’m tired. The next few days he continues to constantly text me and I’m not really sure what to do. I try to take a long time to respond and blame it on my nephews that were visiting at the time and he asks me, “do you want kids of your own?” Umm..ya, but not at the moment. He then says, “Oh you want to wait until you’re married?” At this point I am extremely irritated but don’t want to be rude, since I know he has a kid out of wedlock, so I nicely respond, ya..that’s the plan! To which he responds, “doesn’t everyone?? That was a joke”. Not sure I see the funniness in that…..
So then I try to nicely tell him I’m not interested by telling him, I’m not sure what your intentions are but I’m not interested in dating anyone right now. He responds that’s cool, I just wanted to go grab a drink sometime, did you just get out of a relationship or something? No…I didn’t, I just really don’t want to talk to you. And he still continued to text me regularly.
After consulting with some friends I decide the best way to handle this is the ignore method.
This is how it has been going:
12/25/11 – Merry Christmas!
12/26/11 – Hey how was your Christmas?
12/27/11 – Did you forget about me? =(
1/1/12 – How was your new years?
1/8/12 – Hey
1/17/12 – Happy Bday
1/21/12 – (FB Message) did you change your number or something? i have tried to text you a few times and you never respond =\
At this point I really just want to respond to him and tell him that I don’t think it’s a good idea to speak with him given the fact that he knocked up my brothers girlfriend, probably while my brother was dating her, and I really think it’s extremely inappropriate for him to even think it’d be ok to hang out with me.
Oh, and I later found out that at that same party he got my best friend’s 18-year-old sister in laws phone number…he is 28..gross.
Song of the day: Cry Me a River by, Justin Timberlake. Its pretty obvious why. :)
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