Tuesday, September 4, 2012

The Chase.

So there's this guy. This guy that I always seem to have random make out sessions after a night of drinking. This has been going on for years, sadly. And I've been really proud of myself for keeping my distance and avoiding that situation lately. That was until this last weekend...when my dear friend Shar thought it'd be a good idea to pour shots of Fireball. After one too many shots and a late night jump in the pool, I thought it was a great idea to start messing around with him in the bedroom.

After a while Shar decided she needed to stop the hot mess that was me..and started banging on the door yelling, "Melissa, you got a text message!!" it was 2 am at this point and I yelled at her, "I DONT CARE". I should also note that Shar too had about 5 shots of fireball and weights approx. 107 pounds. I then heard her playing with the door knob and freaked out pushing this guy, who then landed on the floor between the bed and wall, and unable to move. I laughed hysterically..because that's what I do. A few minutes later my phone started ringing outside the door. At this point I thought maybe something was going on and I should answer my phone, so I go grab my phone and see I have a text message and missed called from Shar herself. The text message read, "Don't do it. Chase. Remember they need a chase."

I decided to follow her advice and continue my reign as "the queen of blue balls"

I love my friends.


Song of the day: Hot Mess by, Cobra Starship...because that was just one hot mess of a night.

Big Sister.

I love my sister. Sometimes she can be bossy and overprotective, but I know it's all in love. A few weeks ago my sister and I and some friends and family made a nice little beach vacation weekend getaway. After a little too much wine and tequila tasting, we decided to hit up the local bar.

We found a table to sit at next to some guys that looked like pretty decent guys from a far....they proceeded to small talk with us and eventually one of the guys asked me to dance..I should probably note at this time that he was on crutches and may or may not have been missing a tooth or two...at any rate, I humored him with a dance and sat back down. A little later in the night, he asked me if I wanted to make out, I kindly giggled and said no thanks...but apparently he took this as yes, please, shove your tongue down my throat...and this is exactly what he proceeded to do. I tried to play it off and kind of laugh and push him away, but apparently he didn't get the point.

At this point my sister could see what was going on and yelled at the guy, "DUDE, SHE SAID NO. LEAVE HER ALONE!"

He immediately pulled away from me and got up and left, his friend he was there with then came up to my sister and made the comment, "you don't want to know what is going to happen next"...my sister then noticed a nice little tat on the guys neck with a line that read "cut here". That was about the time she decided it was time to go and grabbed us girls to leave.

Thank God for big sisters.


Song of the day: Pour Some Sugar on Me by, Def Leppard..because I'm pretty sure the band played that song last night.

Social Media

So here's the thing...I feel like social media may be ruining my life. I am a social media junkie. I love Twitter, Facebook, instagram...the list can go on. And after this past weekend, I also think it may be ruining my love life as well.

A friend of mine wanted me to meet a friend of hers...we met up one time, where he proceeded to get ridiculously trashed and ended up puking on my friends floor, then proceeded to sleep in said puke. To say the least, it was a bad first impression. But we became friends on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram..yada yada yada. I hadn't really heard much from him in the months following our encounter other than the occasional Facebook comment or tweet...that was until this past weekend.

This past weekend I received a private Facebook message saying: "So we def know how to social network...let's see if we can text???? xxx-xxx-xxxx ;)"

No. How about we don't. Is what I really wanted to respond with, but being the nice sucker that I am, and not wanting to hurt my friend's feelings, I decided to text him to say hello. When I asked him what he was up to his response was, "At the lake. LTD. pretty much SOP."

Now, I would like to think I'm pretty savvy at my tweet game, but I have no clue what these acronyms mean...after research I discovered LTD was living the dream, but still not quite sure what SOP means...standard operating procedure?!?

I responded to him with "SOP?!?" and never received a response....guess he's just not that into me.

And that my friends, is how social media is ruining my life....and if you know what SOP stands for please let me know, it is driving me crazy!


Song of the Day: How We Do By, Rita Ora. Its catchy.